mo(u)rning

i awaken to the singing birds
a wet nose at my face says let me out
a song inside my heart says let me in
and i am quiet

i had needles in my back last night
to clear these chains that bind me
and a gentle hand upon my heart
told me all is well

and i am quiet

28mar08

another day

it's thursday and the work day is over
excruciating is a word that comes to mind
but then it's all in how I perceive things
blessings are many and more is what I'm after
always the addict on some level

i patiently waited for this day to come to an end
and it is here and I am no more for the worry
I love this simple life did i say that
I just want to be left to process my own reactions
and live my life in blissful peace

A Moment of Silence

wind blowing
snow fall
birds sleep
rain on the window
my heart aches
a baby's smile
a lover's look
hand reached out
arms open
tears streaming
Great Spirit is here
are you?

27mar08

darkness

on the dark side of the mountain
there lived a beautiful short rounded woman
white hair cut close and smiling eyes of brown
skin like caramel candy and arms you just want to be in
she had a voice oh what a voice
and she passed it along to her heirs
she was stricken with grief at the site of her
treasured possession

a mind of her own that child doth have
i'll stand for none of this be still and listen
your heart is pounding to the beat of a different drum
she didn't understand and she cried
the strength of the bear was within her
and the rattle of the monkey on her back
blocked her for many years
and the smile returns upon her face

her smiling eyes still a reminder of who we don't know
and maybe we never will

26mar08

Aretha

Love Goddess enters the stage
and the tears stream
she makes all lovers stop and gaze
at sunset evenings and fireplaces
glowing with heat
Momma's music singing in my ears
and the sweat descends her body
and the sound of the music is like suicide
sweet nectar of love to behold
and her life ain't over
it's just truly begun
they'll be moved by her voice you must know
and the queen of soul has risen to the occasion
and all present have been touch by an angel

thirty days

moon descends the hemisphere
sun rises and you begin again
skin on fire and belly full of anguish
though not by the usual description
there is something different here
surrounded by women you love
inner peace permeates your soul
on one of these early mornings
the sunset makes beautiful your memories
something other than where's the next one
and down this thing lest I feel more heartache
or loneliness I can't bear another day

each day passing presents a new challenge or gift
heartaches resurface and painful memories occur
but love abounds and dinners are shared among many
these everyday moments are piled one by one
and the result is a small orange momentum
to hold in possession, a reminder of time
and though the sun still sets over taboo boulevard
you awaken to gratitude street, and the tears flow

racing heartbeats and thirsty desires are curbed
gauntlet beats down on the desk
and the circle of prayer is begun
listen to stories of successes and failures
there's a lesson in every voice and experience
spoken true from the heart

thirty days is a gift that you've given yourself
bound and held by the chains of addiction no more
on this day

20mar08

I love black and white photos
they capture the true essence of life

Anthony

all moments spent in time are a gift
to behold upon many and few
and the stress of this world
is but a challenge to be in the spirit
not missing a day or an hour

saturday morning giggles in his room
and socks are bound to come off
singing songs only he can understand
this light of my life is a constant reminder
of love and the glory of God

sunny days and stormy nights
are brighter with his presence
silence is a peaceful time
the warmth of his cancer heart
and his laughter are gold to my ears

his momma is where it all started
her gentle face and sweet blue eyes
I held her and rocked in the night
changed my life for all time
and I'll die with blessings unlimited

my life was running to the heartbeat of addiction
and the streets were the place for my feet
though the sun never rose, the pain never gone
it was bitter to avoid without knowing
the depth of my soul it would heal

I pray it never touches the hearts of my children
reflections of love in the mirror of their faces
and smiles and the hugs that they give
I'll hold you forever in my heart

for the love of my God my friends and my lovers
our Creator is the sweetest nectar alive!

Love

Love is like music
and it heals my soul
there are suicides and heartaches
a child with hands on her throat
and the push at the top of the stairs

Love is like sunshine
warms and colors your skin
rises from the outside
to the depth of your being
sets a smile on your face
and awakens the children within

Love is like apples
many colors and flavors
and they're sweet on your tongue
or as bitter as heartache can be
apples and love go together
like sunshine and leaves on a tree

Love is the universe
all people are meant to be healed
Take the heartache - forgiveness
and mix it with time
and the love that you feel will be real

Real love, genuine love comes to us by God's Grace
and the willingness to make another shine!

mar08

aftermath

as i lie here breathing, my heart begins to settle
and the pounding deep within my belly spreads
to loins wet with passion and jumping still
i realize it's you and memories flood my heart and mind
like ocean over sand at high tide in the setting sun

i have longed for this day over years of life passing,
friends dropping by and babies born at 1am
lovers come and gone in the winter of discontent
late nights sleep left crying in my pillow
after pleasuring myself with only you

the glory of a lover lost, left behind, buried deep
then realized, remembered, and resurfaced
is Gods' work in motion
spilled out in the physical form of my life
tears of appreciation for the gifts
i never thought would reappear

my God you are a gentle sort and
in the arms of the woman my soul desires
i am reminded that nothing comes to anyone
without heartache and pure loves' sorrow,
forgiveness and a sense of hope!

i will cherish every moment spent with you

Sunny Afternoon in April

You had me at the first 'hello'.

I've got you under my skin
and I don't know how to shake it
I'm energized and just shy of obsession
over the texture and site of your body
my mind plays tricks upon me and
likens you to my healing Grace
Oh if you only knew of the prayers I've been saying
while on my knees before you
God has blessed me with your presence
and bled upon my pillow cases your sweet face
the memory of which I cannot seem to clear

I'd wish for long nights and afternoons if I didn't know better
perhaps one day
I'll relish in the site of you for longer than a moment
and have the opportunity to cover you in warm water
and wash away the stress
to bring on the untamed passion
I see inside your deep brown eyes and gentle face
I want to ignite your fires and make easy
the entrance to your greatest pleasures
like the blood that rushes through my body
and electrifies every cell and tender spot
I own

How is it you know me so completely
every place you touch feels familiar and alive
waiting for you and knowing
you will leave me with desires quenched and just a question
of will there be a next time
for this touch I seem to crave endlessly
you fill me up with your souls word
share my spirit truly without fear
easily I trust this body before me
and hands that touch me with knowledge
and experience
I am ever grateful for your presence in my life
and certainly
on my body

I am passionate about many things
and I lust for more of you


4.26.02

she

I am going to the movies tonight
and every inch of me screams out
in remembrance
fear lights my skin on fire
equally so does lust
the desire to have and to hold

integrity is a motherload
to carry
on days like this
and so is fear of the unknown